25. Are you seeking a polygamous marriage? 101. 14. Or live together? 3. What if the ex doesn’t provide support, what would you do? 191. From a jurisrpudential viewpoint, the main topic for obedience that is described is with respect to fulfilling the responsibility of the spousal bed, and anything else directly related to that. 100. 71. (Please, no angry emails!) Istikhara is not appropriate for a thing which is inherently forbidden (and to marry someone else while you are married is forbidden). Does a wife have to obey her husband like she has to obey her parents, or is a marriage more about mutual decisions and understanding? 137. Are you willing to be tested for STDs before marriage? Similarly, with respect to tafsir, some people take the word "obedient" (qanitat, 4:34) to mean a woman obeying her husband, others take it to mean a woman obeying God. Are you willing to take a physical exam by a physician, before marriage? If so, what are their names, sex, and ages? Do you want to have children? 79. Who are your friends? If you are a male, are you willing and able to provide the cost of the international visit for your spouse and children to visit their families? 33. Have you ever performed Ummrah or Hajj? Is there any hint that this person might have difficulty with emotional commitment to a relationship? 124. 22. Do you support the idea of utilizing baby-sitters and maids? (poor, lower middle-class, middle-class, upper-middle class, high class). 140. 149. Technically you are married (even if psychologically or socially you are single), so if you want to marry someone else, you should first get a divorce, and then observe iddah if necessary. © Ahlul Bayt Digital Islamic Library Project 1995-2020. , Shaykh Dr Zaid Alsalami is an Iraqi born scholar, raised in Australia. If you converted to Islam, when did you convert? How did you get to know them, and how long have you known them? What is your opinion of speaking other languages in the home that I do not understand? If your family mistreats your spouse in a matter, how would you handle the situation? We are so worried and are wondering if there is any way for us to get married? If you have non-Muslim family members, how do you manage the non-Muslim holidays? If you have children, and get divorced, would the husband be allowed to keep custody if he remarried? 154. If after negotiation, and intervention from family and elders to convince the father, he is still adamant about his refusal, and it is unwarranted, that is when it would be advisable to involve your scholar. Do you have any debts now? 111. Do you dress according to Islamic guidelines? What would you consider causes serious enough for a divorce? How much support, and what methods will be provided for the wife and for how long? 123. What is your understanding of proper health and nutrition? I am a … Anyone can get married in Islam, as long as they meet the correct requirements and obligatory conditions. What do you expect your relationship to be like with the family of your spouse? If there are members of my family that are not Muslim, that are of a different culture or race, what type of relationship do you want to have with them? 171. (That is, if it weren't a concern to you, you wouldn't ask; inside, you already know what you should do but may be second-guessing yourself.). 177. What type of relationship do you want your children to have with all of their grandparents? 108. He undertook Howza classes under esteemed scholars since 2013 and has been teaching at Imam Mahdi... , Amina Inloes is originally from the US and has a PhD in Islamic Studies from the University of Exeter on Shi'a hadith. Chances of Moving and Living Abroad After Marriage: (8 Questions). If your spouse has children from a previous marriage, and their spouse doesn’t permit their children to move abroad, how would you manage this situation? We should strive to maintain our family relationships and not break them off.